


shut off, shut up

by planetundersiege



Series: A Drabble A Day Keeps The Doctor Away [248]
Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Angst, Drabble, Gen, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-05
Updated: 2019-09-05
Packaged: 2020-10-10 09:10:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20525528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/planetundersiege/pseuds/planetundersiege
Summary: Once she had loved going outside.





	shut off, shut up

Once she had loved going outside.

Now, the only time she could feel safe was locked inside of the familiar room that was her own, with all windows shut, lights off, and the only light being the ones from her several pc screens along with the light reflection on her glasses. This was her home, and the only place she didn’t shut down completely in.

Just the thought of going outside made her face go pale, her head to spin as all these horrible memories haunted, while the tears immediately began to seep down her cheeks as she herself felt her throat shut itself like it had done during the countless sessions of hyperventilating that she had experienced through her short life.

She couldn’t leave the tiny room she was confined into, even if she wanted too, she couldn’t. Just thinking about it made her want to vomit, as the fear pulsated all through her body, she felt her whole body shaking as the warm blood was being pumped around inside of her. It made everything worse.

Outside, bad.

Inside, good.

Ugh, she was weak and pathetic. No wonder her mom had hated her so much.

Her mom.

_ NO _

WHY DID SHE THINK THAT?

Now everything, every little detail from that day played in her memory. It was burned to her eyes like a movie into a CD, the details were so fresh, and it was like she even could feel the smell of the outside city. The sound as the car hit her body, everything.

_ NO _

She had fallen out of her chair, and laid in a ball on the floor, her hands violently pressed towards her eyes and cheeks, like if they itched and wanted to be clawed at. The tears continued to run down as she whimpered for her mom. She got even dizzier, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t breathe. Her lungs were already filled to the brink with air and couldn’t take any more, but she couldn’t exhale properly. She was shaking too much, and her head was in an overdrive.

It was all her fault. Life was shit. Everything outside was wrong, she was wrong.

It was all wrong,

WRONG!

She just wanted to..,

Shut off.

Like a computer. The feelings were too much.

She couldn’t leave, and she couldn’t shut off those horrifying emotions that tore her into pieces from the inside.

MONSTER

It was too much.

She wanted everything 

to

** _SHUT UP_ **


End file.
